Gay soldiers unhappy

I’ve always had mixed feelings about American patriotism.  I’ve always admired it.  At the same time, I’ve always been a little jealous of it.

However, sometimes it’s just too much and it gets on your nerves.  Fortunately, it’s only a minority that exaggerates.  For example, when you are in a beach resort, everybody is waiting in line for a drink and someone in the back says “But we are American!” (true story!!).

One aspect of American patriotism I admire is the support for the troops.  My position on the war in Iraq and Afghanistan has always been clear: waste of time, money and most importantly, waste of lives.  But if there is a war, you have to support soldiers fighting for your country.

When I think about soldiers, I see a uniform.  Nowadays, I don’t necessarily see a man.  I don’t see a particular ethnic group either.  As it turns out, my opinion sounds more progressive than I thought.

This is an excerpt of the GOP Presidential debate held last week, in Orlando:

Since it was held in front of a Republican crowd, we would be in our right minds to presume that the people that booed were Republicans.  When I first heard this on the news, I just couldn’t believe my own ears.  I had to verify it on different news sources.

Let me get this straight (no pun intended!!).  Republicans should change the “Support Our Troops” Magnets on their cars for “Support Our Troops...except the fag soldiers”.  What is this?  What’s next?  Catholic Americans booing Muslim American Soldiers?  Brunette females booing blond female soldiers? Red Sox fans booing soldiers supporting the Yankees?

I’m a heterosexual male.  I have friends that are gay that I see every week.  They know I’m heterosexual.  I know they’re gay.  If they didn’t know, and if one of them would try to make a move on me, I would just kindly and diplomatically tell them that I’m heterosexual.  To me, there is absolutely no difference between telling a gay man that I’m not interested than telling a woman I’m not interested (not that they get in line to throw themselves at me either...).

Why are the Republicans so homophobic?  They’ll tell you the Bible-Jesus-God argument.  We all know this is bullshit and that it goes way deeper than that.

Rick Santorum, who runs for the Republican nomination for President of the United States in the 2012 presidential election, says, right after the boos, that "Sexual activity has no place in the military." Sexual activity? I thought we were talking about sexual orientation. So, does Santorum suggest that being part the military imposes a solemn vow of chastity? Really? And you know what really is ironic? Rick Santorum family name is also a word. The definition of a santorum is: a frothy mixture of lubricant and fecal matter as an occasional byproduct of anal sex (I am not making this up!). Maybe Rick Santorum knows more about it than we thought...

So if we go deeper (no pun intended!!), what would explain the animosity of Republicans towards the gay community?

Examples?

LarryCraig, a former Republican politician that represented Idaho's first district in the U.S. House of representatives for 10 years and that served 18 years in the U.S. Senate. Craig namely voted for a proposed constitutional amendment banning gay marriage and against a bill prohibiting employment discrimination based on sexual orientation. Ironically, in 2007, Craig was arrested at the Minneapolis International Airport on suspicion of lewd conduct in a men's restroom. He was accused of soliciting a male undercover cop for sexual activity.

Wait...it gets more slippery...

Mark Foley, another former Republican politician that represented 16th District of Florida in the U.S. House of representatives for 11 years. Foley voted against a proposed constitutional amendment to ban legal recognition of gay marriage. He also voted for a bill that would have banned gays from adopting children in Washington D.C. Despite all of this, in 2006, Foley had sent suggestive emails and sexually explicit instant messages to teenage men who worked or were still working for Congress as pages. Funny note, Foley was one of the foremost opponents of child pornography.

And how about Bob Allen? Here is another Republican member of the Florida House of Representatives, for 7 years, representing Florida's 32nd district. Allen, like the other two, has a record of voting for anti-gay legislation. Nevertheless, in 2007 he was arrested for offering $20 to perform fellatio on an undercover male police officer.

A last quicky?  Glenn Murphy Jr, former Chair of the Young Republicans National Federation.  A young man staying at the home of Murphy’s sister was asleep when he woke up to find Murphy performing oral sex on him.  Brutal wake-up call…

What do we make out all of this?  The Republican Party has a significant gay wing that is strongly opposed to marriage but in favour of secret swinging and adventures?  Or Republicans have a 3 steps program to come out of the closet:

1-     Gay bashing;

2-     Political suicide (or getting caught in a scandal); and

3-     Coming out (voluntarily or…not).

Preaching loudmouths that don’t practice what they preach…let me think...I wonder what they remind me of…(See Catholic Priests from the USA, Canada, Ireland and Belgium).

Gentlemen of the Republican Party, if your Gaydar is buzzing too loudly, maybe it’s because you are standing too close to it.

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New Character(s) brought to this Blog: The Republican Party Gay Wing.

This week’s lucky number: The clue…Mickey Mantle, David Beckham (Manchester United), John Elway and Phil Esposito’s respective jersey numbers.

Personal message: To the guy in the car behind me, honking like crazy: “Maybe I drive slower than you, but I’m still ahead of you!!!”

Note to self: Keep driving slow: you are about to lose your driving license because of an impressive collection of speeding tickets.

Quote of the week: “Love can be magic, but magic sometimes is…just an illusion!!” – An anonymous cuckold

Bad jokes when you are at the customs: “Do I carry any weapons? I refuse to answer this question. I’m taking the 5th [amendment] on that one".

Bad pick-up line: You must have been beautiful, you know, when you were young.

Bad names for rock groups from Boston: New England Clam Chokers, The Red Sucks, The Red Bruins and, The Big Flappy.

Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com

The Predictable Decline of an Empire

Many were not surprised by the economical decline of the United States of America (and to that, we raise our hand).  However, there is no doubt that President Barack Obama got a rotten deal.  All partisanship aside, he was bound to fail.  George W. Bush went to war and President Obama got the bill.  He also “acquired” the responsibility of finding a way to get out of Iraq and Afghanistan without creating a crisis.  And because such a crisis is almost inevitable, he will also have the burden to solve the crisis.

And, in the end, probably President Obama’s successor will get all the credit for the fruits of the dirty job accomplished.

As if it wasn’t enough, President Obama inherited of an economy of overspending.  We do not pretend to be experts in economics, finances or politics.  However, it does not take a degree from the London School of Economics to understand that spending more than you make will basically lead you to trouble.  We tried it in elementary school with a lemonade stand.  Two words: grease fire.  School-shylocks are still looking for us…

Added to that, many Americans overly mortgaged their home (in some cases, up to 100 %).  The result was predictably perilous and disastrous as if we humbly attempted to skateboard our way on a metal rail attached to concrete stairs (a lifetime first).  No one would try that, right?

Lots of people have done it (both the skateboard stunt and the overspending/overmortgaging) and failed miserably.

Why do people always buy stuff? To numb fears?  To numb boredom?  We certainly think that partnerships between The Drama Queen Media and an assortment of Nutcases contributed to that.  For example, some Nutcase shoots his boss and a few key employees, before killing himself, and The Drama Queen Media leads off with “Could this happen at your work place?”.  Corporate loves that equation.  Remember: we consume more when we are scared.

Of course, we buy goods for essential needs, right?  *annoying buzzer noise* - WRONG!!!

Electrical-stimulation abdominal belts (working out without efforts…really?), food dehydrators and the Hawaiian Chair (Please…Google it!).  Why don’t you just slap us with a Shamwow!!  Or why not buy the latest 3D plasma television?  It’s about time to get rid of our HD 50 inches plasma television which is already almost 2 years old.  And our neighbour (which looks happier than us) has the brand new 3D screen.  “Gonna get me some happy!”.

What about productivity at work?  For a long time, internet porn was the cause of “unproductivity” at work.  Guess what?  Porn is not as sexy as it used to (no pun intended).  Now you have your football and baseball fantasy leagues (takes no more than 6-8 hours per day), social networks, March Madness, TMZ, chats, meeting-the-love-of-your-life.com and e-mail jokes/junk.  If your hobbies get in the way of your job, get rid of the job, they say.

In the end, does the overspending and overpleasures bring happiness?  Well use of anti-depressor, drugs and alcohol constantly increasing tend to point in the opposite direction.

But let’s not fool ourselves.  This is not the decline of a nation.  This is not the decline of an empire.  This is the decline of the people.  If we really want to make this better, we must stop the blaming game (most of the time, based solely on partisanship).  The people, as a whole, has to take the major part of the blame.  No one forced the people to overspend, overmortgage or waste time at work.  Where have we stopped being responsible and accountable adults?  Complaining does not help.  It’s high times to put the debts where the people mouth is (the money is all gone…we have to put something else where our mouth is!!).

Work hard.  Spend less than you make.  Save the difference…for a rainy day.  High school economics…and good ‘ol common sense.

Enough already with all of this Mumbo Jumbo.  If we work hard, we also have a right to play hard.  Miss Beach Party would ask: “Recession? Is that the cool new brand of tequila?”.  (By the way, her original name was Miss Budweiser, but we wanted to broaden our sponsorship possibilities to other kinds of beers, including Duff Beer).

Miss Beach party believes in living the present moment and that you only live once…but in her own way.  After hearing the definition of recession, she would pause and scream “Woo! Hoo! Free Beer! Oh no…I lost my bra.  But I don’t care!”

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New Character(s) brought to this Blog: Miss Beach Party (formerly Miss Budweiser) and Corporate (played by companies that have greater revenues than most countries around the world and that watch our every move, to get to know us better).

This week’s lucky number (we know it’s stupid...but please, just play along!): 7 (Yes! Again! And why not?).

Personal message: To my plump-pushing-60 female neighbour that walks naked in her apartment at night, in the dark: “If you open the refrigerator door, I can see you. I would prefer you not doing that”.

Quote of the week: “Stop being so stupid…it’s my turn” – Anonymous (Nutcase).

To do: daydreaming.

Rejected song title: It’s not because you’re ugly

Bad choice of a rock band name: Madoff and the Enrons

Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com

The “ends” of the world

As we witness the sad images of violence from the suburbs of London, it’s easy to ask ourselves a few questions: has the whole world gone completely crazy? Is it the end of the world?

Add to that the never ending wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, Palestine, Libya, Syria, Côte d’Ivoire, Darfur, etc. Even insignificant events turn sour in an instant…Like the riots in Vancouver after a Stanley Cup loss in the Finals. Or even worse: when they reintroduced the blue colored Smarties in May 2010, as we all remember. One must wonder if the Apocalypse is knocking at the door. We can already see The Nutcases salivating…Unfortunately, The Nutcase will be a recurring character in our silly blog.

Yes. Maybe we are crazy. As a matter of fact, we are quite sure we are. But we don’t think we are worse than the world was at other times in history. The media surely wants us to believe that every day. According to The Drama Queen Media (from now on, we will refer to the media as The Drama Queen Media), the world is on the verge of collapsing. For some crazy unknown reason, it seems we consume more when we are scared. As a result, we live in a culture of fear. No wonder terrorism is on the rise.

But for fun, just imagine how The Drama Queen Media would be covering the Crusades? Or the Spanish Inquisition? Or the French Revolution? Or the Crucifixion of Jesus? How about The Drama Queen Media covering a reality show of Cro-magnon men. All of them groaning and hitting themselves on the head with sticks every time they would disagree. Hilarious! Actually, they would not be able to air that today, you know, to maintain social order. Otherwise, people might think it’s a better (and cheaper) idea to hit their “ex” with a stick instead of hiring an expensive lawyer. I have to admit, it’s very tempting…

Violence is not only part of the history of the world, but it most certainly shaped it. People were killed for not believing in the same God, for believing that the world is round, for having epilepsy, etc. The world, sadly, has a history of violence. It looks like a big wheel that increases from level 1 to 10, turning round and round, clockwise, marking time.

Lately, we have only refined our reasons for killing. Nowadays, we read about killing the significant other for leaving (sometimes along with the children), stabbing a soccer referee for missing a call, shooting boss after a layoff, or murdering female students…simply for being women. Are we near level 10? Well, that would be like saying that World Wars I and II were level 5-6? Our humble opinion is that Holocaust has to be a solid 10. On the other hand, The Drama Queen Media would say that every day is a solid 10 on the nightly news.

So if you ever feel the urge to kick a guy’s family jewels for saying “at least you have your health”, or to puncture your bosses’ lungs with a crowbar, or to smash your 1999 Chrysler Cirrus in a government agency entrance, c’mon dude, be original!!! That’s nothing that hasn’t been done already during Medieval times (except maybe for the Chrysler thing).

But if you want to do something that hasn’t been done before (you know, because what we’ve tried yet as not worked): try to change your own small world. If everybody did that, we are optimistic that the world would change faster and more efficiently than whatever we are doing now.

On another note, we surely hope Mother Nature will read our modest blog (In our dreams…Yeah! Right! like she cares!). Mother Nature scares us way more than violence itself. We would like to bet that she is actually doing tests to wipe us off of this rock (See Japan, Haïti, Chile, Australia, New Zealand, etc.). Maybe she’ll come up with a bullet-proof-Ebola-like virus or a mega worldwide Tsunami (if you don’t swim, that might be a good time to learn).

In the meantime, The Nutcases around the world will have something to look for: the end of the world in 2012. I have to specify the year because we just “had” one this year, in May.

2012 is just another scare…or is it?

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New Character(s) brought to this Blog: The Drama Queen Media (played any and all media) and The Nutcase(s) (played by your average local moron, screw loose, loser, goofball, dunce, loony, idiot, insane, screwball, round the bend, nut job and/or politician).

This week’s lucky number (we know it’s stupid...but please, just play along!): 7

Personal message: To the guy that keeps honking every time he picks up someone for carpooling very early in the morning: “Get off your fat ass, you lazy douche bag, and knock on the person’s door”.

Quote of the week: “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night” – Anonymous (stoner).

To do: say something kind to someone you really don’t know.

Bad choice of a rock band name: London Riots

Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com