The ends don't justify being mean

What is the common denominator among the following persons or fictional characters? Darth Vader, J.R. Ewing (Dallas), Adolf Hitler, Bill O'Reilly, Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs), Ted Bundy (serial killer), HAL 9000 (2001: A Space Odyssey), Zombies (they're everywhere!!), Roddy Piper (wrestling), Attila The Hun, A-Rod (a.k.a. Alex Rodriguez, baseball player), Josef Stalin, Sideshow Bob (The Simpsons), Doctor Evil (Austin Powers), Mr. (Montgomery) Burns (The Simpsons), The Shark (Jaws), Sean Avery (hockey), terrorists, The Tasmanian Devil, The I.R.S. and last but not least, politicians.

The common denominator? You got it! They are all villains.

But why are they villains? Most of them want to dominate the world (Darth Vader, J.R. Ewing, Hitler, Stalin, Doctor Evil, Sideshow Bob, Mr. Burns, politicians, etc.).

Some of them are just very hungry (The Shark, The Tasmanian Devil, Zombies, The I.R.S., A-Rod, etc.).

Some of them are just evil (Ted Bundy, terrorists, Sean Avery, Bill O'Reilly, etc.).

But there is a new brand of evil people that just made its apparition in the USA: people shopping on Black Friday.

Last Black Friday, a woman entered a crowded Walmart, near Los Angeles, looking for some electronic apparel. She must have been inconvenienced by the overcrowded store and the waiting lines. And who would blame her? Where we differ is how we would react to the same situation. I, for one, would have chosen to leave (But that's only hypothetical...'cause I never go to those crazy events). Yes, I love to take advantage of rebates like the next guy. But I wouldn't waste a day off from work for a buck or two of discount. While I would be leaving, she, the Walmart woman, would be ready to do anything to get the item she wants. A real winner. She's not a quitter like me...noooooo! In other words, she would have found a roster spot with the Oakland Raiders of the 70's. Like the late Al Davis used to say "Just win, baby", and "If you don't cheat, you don't try".

To gain an upper hand, she used pepper spray on other customers. Just imagine the scene: you are walking in a shopping mall or a store, and suddenly a woman rushes towards you, armed with a can of pepper spray, starts to shoot some pepper spray straight at your eyes. Your eyes burn like fire even before you've figured out what's going on.

20 people suffered minor injuries. Nevertheless, Black Friday found a new meaning...MEANing...

They are still looking for the woman. I bet she's not even worried. Al Davis would be proud of her: she did what she had to do, what it takes.

You just can't create crazy stories like that one.

Good news: the store remained open (Thank God!!!) and those not affected by the pepper spray continued shopping (as they should!!!).

But pepper spray is soooooo passé. Here's my suggestion on how to grab the pole position on Black Friday next year. First you seal (with a plastic bag, perhaps) the item you want to buy on Black Friday (preferably, on the eve of D-Day). You tie the sealed item to a brick (or some sort of heavy rock). The morning of Black Friday, instead of running to get an item, you completely flood the store with water. You fill the store until the water level reaches 4 feet from the sealing. Most of the customs would need to swim to the surface to, you know, breathe (duh!). People not being able to swim would die (there are no wars without casualties!!!). Every item in the store would be ruined, except for your sealed item. Then you enter the store with your deep-sea diving suit, slowly walking towards the ultimate prize: your sealed item. No violence. No danger of being last. And finally, if you are extremely honest, you leave the money at the cash register (which would be likely to move, because of the water).

By the way, for those with no sense of humor, I was kidding. I was being sarcastic!!

I'd like to tell you that the woman pepper spraying was the only incident...(see the video).

In the next video, you would expect that people were fighting to get into a rock concert or a Lady Gaga show...(see the video).

Black Friday...at midnight!!! People were waiting to get into an H&M store (clothes) to do what? Yep! You've guessed it: buy more stuff!! (Most of which will end up in boxes in your garage...that will ultimately prevent you from parking you car in it!! In other words, useless stuff will make you shovel snow...and/or park in the rain!!).

So is that the new trend? Physically injuring people to buy stuff. They don't even want to steal the goddamn item. They just want to buy the thing, with a rebate, and they have no time for buying it like a normal person would.

Animals. Maybe educated...but still, animals.

So what's next? (see the video)

Stomping, trampling and crushing people to buy stuff. After all, isn't that what Thanks Giving is all about? Isn't it part of a balanced life? Can't you hear them scream in stores everywhere "It's either you or me, buddy!".

As a pretty cool dude would say, "Do onto others as you would like done onto you". I don't want to rain on your parade, but I think we are constantly moving away from it. Is that where I should say "Love your enemies"???

---

THE HODGEPODGE

This week’s lucky number:  The clue: the number of deadly sins.

Happy and Dandy Clown of the Week: Again, Barack Obama. He's witnessing, with a smirk on his face, that the front running 2012 Republican Presidential Candidate is Newt Gingrich, whose campaign went completely down the drain last summer. The only strategy is to simply wait until he derails again.

Sad Clown of the Week: Jim Boeheim, head coach of the Syracuse University Basketball team. He earns the title for lashing out at the alleged victims of sexual molestation, by former assistant coach Bernie Fine, calling them liars and saying that they were only seeking money. Since then, Fine was fired and Boeheim apologized for his rude comments.

Clever song lyrics: "Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind." - Song: Lateralus - Artist: Tool

Cheesy song lyrics: "Together we’re one. Separated, we are two." Song: Girl You Know it’s True - Artist: Milli Vanilli (Bad at songwriting...but hey, you gotta give it to them...they're good at math!)

Philosophical Quote of the week: "Oh man, I shot Marvin in the face." Character: Vincent Vega (wonderfully played by John Travolta) - Movie: Pulp Fiction

New saying involving the word "dead": “Dead as Herman Cain's campaign.”



Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com

A yellow card for inappropriate behaviour

A little more serious this week. But we still have the Hodgepodge at the end of this article...on a lighter note.

Man has a tendency to fear the unknown. In reaction to that fear, Man has created many mechanisms to protect himself. One of the modern mechanisms is without a doubt cocooning. With television, the Web, including social media, eBay, on-line shopping, food ordering services, who needs to go out? In the comfort of our living room, we are almost immune (or we pretend we are) against mugging, diseases, rudeness and unpleasantness of other people, accidents, etc.

Furthermore, Man is unable to live with the fact that he can't explain why something happened. And the fact that Man cannot fathom something that occurred will sometimes motivate him to push beyond his limits. In the end, he may even surpass his own expectations. Inspired to conquer the unknown, he may conquer his fears as well.

However, on the darker side, when he is a little lazier (as many of us are), Man may be tempted to invent, imagine or improvise an explanation. That's where it gets messy. That's where it also gets interesting. Our Modern Circus, as we know it now, loves to conceive and produce stories to reassure itself. If the answer is unknown, we'll figure out some plausible explanation, then we'll pretend it's real. We'll repeat it so many times that we'll believe it and then, we'll sell it to the people. And they will buy it too (until they find out the truth...but how long 'til they find out?).

Replace "we" by the media and you get what we see every day on the news. The media will find some wacky, wacko, pseudo-expert to make us swallow the explanation that suits any problem. "Ma! If they said it on the TV, I reckon it must be true!" (to read with your best southern accent).

Someone gets killed in your neighbourhood. Of course it's a tragedy. The media implies that you could be next. "Ma! I reckon we need to find tha killa, ma" (again with your best southern accent).

But if they find only a body...but they are no leads. "We need to find a culprit". No evidence against anyone? Media publishes polls on TV saying that the "man on the street" thinks that the first guy that the police interrogated looks suspicious. He lives alone, doesn't talk much, a little shy and anti-social, doesn't seem too intelligent, doesn't care about his general appearance. In other words, he would have no chance to be selected on American Idol (probably the only thing he would be guilty of). If they had to bet money on it, they would bet against him.

Silently, people think that its not such a bad idea. Police wouldn't mind saying they solved it. A scapegoat would be so convenient. Until we catch a culpable party, people live in fear, in the unknown. Like a magician, the "scapegoat" will transform the unknown into a (pseudo) known. Everyone will finally sleep at night. But we would have to cross our fingers the real killer doesn't start killing again...

This is dangerous stuff. When it comes to condemn a person, it's not a "democracy" in a sense that it should not be determined by a poll. Leave polls to TMZ (where you can vote on whether Kim Kardashian should go through with her divorce...). If a person is innocent until proven guilty, I guess it all has to be based on evidence. It's sort of scientific. There's a method to it. It surely has nothing to do with what the "man on the street" thinks.

Please watch the next video. It's a little long, so please forward it to 6:30:

That was the street reaction to the verdict in the Conrad Murray trial was found guilty on one count of involuntary manslaughter of pop star Michael Jackson. A jury found Murray guilty. I'm pretty sure justice was served.

But in the video, at 6:30, you actually hear a crowd cheering out loud. Folks, this is not American Idol or The X Factor. This is not about cheering for your favorite singer, nor is it about cheering for your favorite sports team. Let's keep this in perspective.

I guess the crowd was composed of Michael Jackson fans. But the verdict won't bring him back. The verdict will have absolutely no direct effect on the fans lives either. What is there to cheer about? A man going to prison. Is that what it all comes down to? Is that what we've become as people? I'm satisfied that Conrad Murray will go to jail for what he's done. Nevertheless, the crowd going wild doesn't seem appropriate in my book. It seemed like they were convinced before the trial, before seeing the evidence. Could they influence the jury before the verdict? This ain't right.

Are we too much accustomed to contests like Dancing with the stars and do we feel we have to react that way to any event? Is it the anonymous factor...the Twitter factor? It's easy to take an anonymous stand, without assuming the responsibility of the choice. Some people are referring to it as an historic moment. Really?

Worst part is that it seems to be a new trend (see the video).

If you didn't know the video was about the reaction to Osama Bin Laden's death confirmation, when you hear the "USA! USA! USA!" chant, you could swear that it was a soundbite taken during the Olympics. A sigh of relief would certainly be in order. But cheers, chants and celebrations? Chauvinism. We are not playing video games here where soldiers that die are fictional. After the thousands of American soldiers that died during that war, out of respect for them, I don't see how we can be in a celebrating mood. The troops are still at war. And even if an evil man was killed, Evil (including terrorism) didn't die with him. People in other countries cheer when something bad happens to USA? Ok. But do we have to lower ourselves to their level?

On that day, I had a sigh of relief, I prayed for all the troops that died and for all the ones that are still out there. I keep my cheers for my beloved New England Patriots, during football games...where cheers belong.

In sports, you get penalties or yellow cards for unsportsmanlike misconduct or unnecessary roughness. We should be able to give those in real life, for every day behaviour. Today, I would give a penalty for inappropriate behaviour to all of the above-mentioned people.

Remember this wonderful quote by the late Senator Daniel Patrick Moynihan: "Everyone is entitled to his own opinions, but not his own facts."

---

THE HODGEPODGE

This week’s lucky number: The clue...sept (in French).

Clever song lyrics: "Eleanor Rigby died in the church and was buried along with her name. Nobody came." - Song: Eleanor Rigby - Artist: The Beatles.

Cheesy song lyrics: "Mmm bop, ba duba dop, ba du bop, ba duba dop, ba du bop, ba duba dop, Ba du." - Song: MMMBop - Artist: Hanson. (Ah! Goddammit! I'm stuck with that stupid song in my head now!!! Grrr...).

Bad rock group names for Herman Cain:  1-Raising Cain; 2-Herman & the Victims; 3-Grope'n'fondle.

Bad idea for a movie: A young millionaire woman, named Kim, marries her boyfriend, makes money with the marriage itself, then files for divorce after 90 days...then tries to make money with the divorce too (wait a minute...I heard about that before somewhere...).

Good idea for a movie sequel: A girl, named Kim, bumps her head, then realizes she has no talent whatsoever, decides to abandon everything she's got and becomes a nun in Tibet. She brings her talentless friend, named Paris, with her.

Suggestion of a bad musical combination comparable to Metallica and Lou Reed: Willie Nelson and Motörhead.

Appropriate song for the Penn State University scandal soundtrack: "Say it ain't so, Joe" (Re: Joe Paterno)


Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com

Every day Hell-oween

This week, I will stay off politics. So, instead of disgusting you, I will try to scare you. It's our Halloween special, Modern Circus style.

People love reality shows because they have the impression that it is real. Nowadays, we all know that most of them are scripted. At the very least, they're either staged or provoked by third parties...which are themselves, scripted.

But how would you feel if something straight out of the movies happened to you without notice? How would you feel if you became the hero (or victim!!) of a horror story writing itself as it occurs? It's all fun and games when you watch it on television. Living vicariously makes everyone a brave know-it-all hero. But if you became the one calling the shots, would you know what to do? Would you be a hero or a zero?

Let's say that you go to the mall. You want to buy a pair of slackers or maybe a Shamwow at the "As seen on TV" store. Then, the plan would lead you to the food court for a burrito or a two-scoops cone of ice cream. As you enter the mall, you smile like a child, knowing you are only a few minutes away from a double scoop of triple fudge and caramel ice cream when suddenly you feel something coming behind you. Is it a young boy running and not looking he's going? Or a policeman running to catch a shoplifter? As you turn around, holding the entrance door, you feel that something is just not right. Your brain finds it almost impossible to compute.

Horses are running towards you. And do you want to know why? A 300 pounds Bengal tiger is chasing them, soon followed by three leopards and one large grizzly bear. No it's not Jumanji. This is not taken from a movie. It's not fiction either. It happened for real, on October 18, 2011, in the woods surrounding the city of Zanesville, Ohio. A total of 56 exotic (and dangerous) animals were released from a local farm by its owner, who according to the latest news, committed suicide right after he freed them.

Schools were closed (thank God!!). Most of the residents stayed home, as the local authorities, none of them equipped with tranquilizer guns, hunted lions, tigers, leopards and grizzly bears (in Ohio...of all places!).

Of the 56 animals, 49 were killed (18 tigers, 17 lions, 6 black bears, 2 grizzly bears, 3 mountain lions, 2 wolves and 1 baboon). Those captured alive were taken to a local zoo. I guess that the Modern Circus wouldn't be a real circus without animals.

But just imagine the scene. You drive on the Interstate and suddenly, you have to hit the brakes to yield the way to a giraffe. By the way, just a question like that...Where do you buy lions, tigers, leopards, grizzly bears and baboons? Do you buy them on eBay? FedEx delivers them to you? But seriously, is it legal to own them?

But let's say, for the sake of argument, that you make it safely to the shopping mall. The ice cream seems a little further than before, all of the sudden. As you walk through the mall, you have again this strange feeling that something is coming behind you. As you turn around, your brain finds it almost impossible to compute...you see a woman rushing towards you with not one, not two, not even three, but four knives. And in a flash of the blade (no pun intended), you get stabbed repeatedly. Farfetched, you say? Too much Hollywood? Well hold your horses before you rush to conclusions. It really happened.

On May 25, 2005, a woman armed with 4 knives entered a shopping mall in Bethesda, near Washington D.C., and randomly attacked shoppers.

But let's say, for the sake of argument, that you made it safely out of the shopping mall. You ate your ice cream. You got your Shamwow. You decide to walk the streets of your city, you know, just to relax, when suddenly you are attacked by...mopeds!!!

Mopeds???

I promised I wouldn't tackle politics. But if you had to choose your poison, what would you choose? Bengal tigers, crazy person with knives or mopeds?

Although life is not easy, and in a blink of an eye it can become tragic and life threatening, we have to live our lives. If we stay home, isolated and scared, we are already dead. I believe that when your time has come, you will die, no matter what you do. In the meantime, might as well make the best of it. Live it as if it was your last day on this rock...because, it just might be!

Rule #1 of survival in this Modern Circus: Hope for the best, expect the worst.

And remember, it's all fun and games until someone steals your jersey...

I'm a huge New England Patriots fan. And it always hurts to see a favourite player, namely Rob Gronkowski, being attacked and having his Jersey taken away by a reckless thief. And don't be fooled by the size of the blond thief!! She must have tremendous powers to manage to take away the jersey from the 6'6 265 lbs Pats tight end. The blond burglar, Bibi Jones, is known to be a multi-tasker (Re: porn star) that has a specific talent to find the Achilles' heel in every sports' Trojans (no pun intended!). In this case, the weak spot is not a soft spot...So children, don't wear a Patriots uniform on Halloween. But if you have to, beware of petite blonds (unless you are a Dad and that's what you are exactly looking for!!).

But seriously, we are ways away from Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen...

---

Happy Halloween to all the kids...and all the kids at heart!!!

---

THE HODGEPODGE

This week’s lucky number: The clue…The _________ Wonders of the World.

Clever song lyrics:  "I can't complain, but sometimes I still do." - Song: Life's been good - Artist: Joe Walsh.

Cheesy song lyrics: "You pulled the trigger of my love gun" - Song: Love gun - Artist: Kiss.

Bold Halloween costume: Black man that wears a Hitler costume with the short mustache screaming "Nine! Nine! Nine!" (Name of the costume: Herman Cain and his 9-9-9 plan).

Bad Halloween candy: Apples. Message to people giving apples: They're not candy!!!

What should happen to people giving apples instead of candy: Their Halloween pumpkins ought to be frantically stabbed with grapefruit spoons.

Quote of the week #1: “Are you disguised as a prostitute? Oh...you are not disguised...” – Anonymous shopping for a slap in the face.

Quote of the week #2: “Are you disguised as a pregnant woman? Oh...you are not disguised...Are you pregnant? Not pregnant either...oops!” – Anonymous shopping for a six pack of slaps in the face.

New name for the Texas Rangers (MLB baseball): The Texas Bills.


Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com

Like falling dominoes

I don't know about you, but usually, when I hear a politician speak, I only hear this:

The only difference between the baby girl in the video and politicians is that the baby is funny (and the politicians are utterly boring). But the language is basically the same.

Being a politician has become mainly a poll job...ooops! That didn't sound right (even if there is some truth to it). Let me rephrase that. Being a politician has mainly become a job based on poll results. Boring, inefficient with enormous (negative) economic consequences. No discrimination here. Whatever is the political allegiance, it's all the same blah! blah! blah!.

Exceptionally this week, a quote burned my ears. For once, it was not blah! blah! blah! The quote came from Herman Cain, American businessman, syndicated columnist and a candidate for the Republican Presidential nomination in 2012. Cain candidly declared, word for word, during a television interview that "It's Your Own Fault if You Don't Have a Job! In other words: It's not the economy, stupid, it's YOU!"

I don't want to go in the specifics of that statement in this blog. It would be boring and I don't have another second to waste on that (insensible and ignorant) individual. Let's just say that I strongly disagree.

The question is: Can we really count on politicians to change the world? Our World. Can we count on them to make it better? Of course not. They make moves to please only some people (mostly those who contribute to their political campaigns).

Here's how I think people can change the world. Or maybe "should change the world" would be more accurate: Take ideas and act upon them (Can you hear politicians in the background ask "how do we do that, act? Can't we just talk about the ideas?).

Examples.

Back in 2006, an American teenage girl and her father, a journalist, were on spring break in Venice, Italy. While the daughter was on a shopping spree, the father headed back to the hotel room. He stumbled upon a BBC documentary on children of Africa dying of malaria. Make that 3,000 children per day (you read that right...per day!). It also mentioned that if the children would just sleep under a mosquito bed net, they would be almost entirely protected from malaria. That net only costs $10. Not that much to save one life. Nevertheless, those children died every day because they didn't have nets.

That man had an idea and acted upon it. On May 1, 2006, he wrote a column about it in a Sports Magazine you might have heard of before (Sports Illustrated). That man is Rick Reilly. That day, maybe without realizing it at the time, he changed the world. He also happened to save lives. Then there was some sort of chain reaction and the whole thing snowballed into a World Wide campaign. To make a long story short, NothingButNets.net has distributed almost 4.25 million mosquito bed nets. In other words, the charitable organization has raised almost $42.5 million for the cause.

Can you just imagine for a second a government trying to help African children dying of malaria? First there would be a study or commission or any other bullcrap meeting of politicians that would cost about 40 million dollars. The result of the study would be: Africa needs mosquito bed nets (what we already knew!!). The cost of the study would leave us with a tiny budget of $2.5 million to buy the nets. The government would send only 25,000 nets to Africa (because of the $2.25 million for the travelling expenses of the politicians sent in Africa to have pictures taken with dying African children and for the ads on tv to show the goddamn pictures).

More NothingButNets.net, less government. And what about examples that would help the economy? Or if you prefer, what about job creation?

Two high school outcasts that became college dropouts in the mid 70's. They identified the need to produce print-outs, labels and databases, in a world that was lead by typeriters. They combined genius with creativity in...a garage. And with the help of a $20 Central Processing Unit (CPU), produced by MOS Technology, they assembled their first personal computer. With the exception of the parents that lent the garage, and maybe the first store that sold their first product, not many believed in their bold project.

The company, as Forrest Gump would refer to it as "some kind of fruit company", is Apple Inc. The founders: Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs. Yes jobs. Apple Inc. employs almost 50,000 persons. Real jobs from a real Jobs. Not bad for a fruit company.

Never underestimate the power of the geek or outcast with a dream, a goal...an obsession. He or she will not exclusively talk about the idea (remember politicians? blah! blah! blah!...shouting make believe numbers like an auctioneer). The geek will do something about it.

Invest in people, not in politicians (yes, you've read that right...politicians are excluded from the first group!).

I believe that ideas lead to other ideas, like falling dominoes. And if someone takes that idea and acts upon it, that idea could change the world. According to the the Chaos Theory, more precisely, the Butterfly Effect, the flap of a butterfly’s wings in Brazil could set off a tornado in Texas. In other words, a slight change in the conditions of a system could provoke a chain of events leading to out of proportions results.

Consequently, a reader of this modest blog could have an idea, act upon it, and maybe inspire other persons to have ideas on their own...and ultimately change the world. And I like to believe that this is the only efficient way that you and me can change the world. Like falling dominoes.   

---

A big shoutout to Lana Leclerc for her work on the new graphics for this blog. Thanks for everything you've done and most of all, thank you for supporting this blog from the very beginning.

---

This week’s lucky number: The clue…a movie directed by David Fincher starring Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman and Kevin Spacey.

Note to self: Always check your pant's pockets for tissues before putting them in a washing machine.

Note to self #2: Sometimes patience is not a virtue...it is a waste of time.

Indirect way to disagree: “I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”

Mixing up numbers: “He had 3 children with 4 different women”.

Bad pick-up line: I think I've dated your mom. How is the ferocious cougar?

Bad name for a rock group in Milwaukee: Prince (Fielder) and The Devolution.

Love letters, comments, opinions and complaints: reflectionsonamoderncircus@gmail.com